A Live Green, Live Smart Briefing

Finding love, or even a date, can be a complicated project.  Its not easy to get to know another person let alone oneself.  One issue that always eventually arises is values and environmental values are increasing as an identity issue. 

Do you desire a companion who recycles and composts everything but toenails, and lives in a crib lit by compact fluorescents or can you accept someone who proudly drives an SUV and tosses glass bottles in the trash? For a growing number of daters, environmental attitudes are a bottom line for qualifying potential beloveds. 

As concern about climate change and environmental issues have become mainstream, for many people living their values means finding like-minded carbon-footprint reducers who take their sustainability seriously.  A new trend dubbed eco-dating helps create social networks of self-proclaimed tree-huggers, Prius drivers and composters who prefer a date familiar with Al Gore and global greenhouse population over one tied into television desperadoes and housewives and conspicuous consumption.

Eco-dating is socially responsible dating with a twist, the twist being shared concern for the environment.  This is not just a meeting of minds: theres plenty of romance but it may be observed with locally grown organic flowers instead of shipped-in roses, and the chocolates are likely to be fair trade and coercion-free.  Organic wineries are doing their bit to provide bottles worthy of amore, and even pillows are being made of non-toxic renewable bamboo fibers.

And the result of eco-dating may be an eco-wedding, where the debris of nuptial merry-making is recyclable plates and compostable waste after an organically-grown banquet.

Green Social Networking

Driving the eco-dating trend is, of course, the Web, where social networking sites cash in on the green cache.  Ecosexuals have entered the lexicon as tree-huggers devoted to energy reduction and environmental activism and they can be found at web sites devoted to people who are, well, just like you.

Chief among the ecosexual sites: Green Singles (greensingles.com), Green Passions (green-passions.com), Vegan Passions (veganpassions.com) and Earth Wise Singles (ewsingles.com).  A quick glance at the sites shows they all have various levels of membership benefits and fees, ranging from free to $48 annually, in one instance. 

They are not much different than other dating sites except for one thing the shared passion for the environment.

Topics of discussions on the sites and on dates might include global warming, socially responsible investing, public transit, political activism and other green-related issues.  Restaurants and artists and dream (green) homes are offered to the communitys attention.  After all love deserves great background.

Earth Wise Singles describes itss members characteristics:  green-living and environmentally responsible adults; friends of Mother Earth; organic gardeners, farmers, and ranchers; lovers of nature and the outdoors; concerned about human rights and world peace; interested in alternative and holistic medicine; looking for long-term friendship and romance.

Sound about right? Sound like you?

A Case Study in Shared Causes

Lets look at Jan Stillman (not her real name) from the University of Northern Iowa, and her date, Eric (who requested anonymity).  They might have met at any of the businesses or environmental cause rallies they both frequent but they actually met online, using a website that promotes meetings between daters of an Earth-aware frame of mind.

They both dress in organic cotton clothing on dates [Only on dates??], take personal mugs to coffee shops to avoid wasting paper on disposable cups and bike almost everywhere they go. They use public transit when they cant bike due to weather.

They buy organics and try to eat at restaurants that focus their menu on locally grown foods.  Jan never wears perfume and Eric never wears after-shave lotion.  Eric sometimes wears shoes that have been purchased from the local Good Will store just to show his interest in recycling he wears leather, but only secondhand leather, so he wont encourage excessive animal agriculture (Jan accepts this, though she prefers her own footwear cruelty free).

Both Jan and Eric have contributed to socially responsible funds, like the Carbon Fund.Org, which offsets the amount of carbon their educational footprint has created. We share a desire to change the world in our own way by reducing our use of fossil fuels and our consumption of consumer goods, says Jan. We hope to inspire others to do the same.  When they save or (eventually) invest, they will insist on environmental sensitivity in their funds.

Some people in the environmental community see the value of such focused social networking sites. Joshua Houdek, an organizer for the North Star Chapter of the Sierra Club in Minneapolis, sees the eco-dating sites as providing an opportunity to meet people with similar values and experiences. Its a way to learn more about other individuals who are doing their part to produce a more sustainable lifestyle. I see it as a good trend. And in a large city or in dispersed rural communities, time to find an eco-soulmate can never be too abundant, nor opportunities too many.

Green Marriage Ceremonies

Eco-dating sometimes leads to a wedding.  And weddings tend to be wasteful affairs, with people holding several pre-ceremonies bachelor parties and bridesmaid gatherings, gift showers and engagement parties at various locations prior to the ceremony. The ceremonies and the receptions often take place at different venues, leading to more transportation for guests who travel to be with their friends and loved ones for this special adventure.

Add in paper invitations, balloons and other decorations, plates and disposable champagne glasses and other materials, and you have a small landfill of celebratory stuff.

Houdek and Kristi Papenfuss are doing their wedding differently. Houdek met his bride at a contra dance, and their subsequent first date involved climbing and camping. Both committed environmentalists, they quickly found they had much in common, including several ideas for a different kind of wedding.

Were doing as much as we can to reduce the consumption thats involved in a typical wedding, says Houdek. Its not a perfect process. We wanted to get married in a park and the park we chose is in a suburban location so people will have to drive. But we have suggested a web site where carbon offsets can be purchased by people attending the wedding.

The park may be a bit out of town, but the couple made sure to have the reception and wedding at the same location to avoid having to make people drive between locations.

After Houdek and Papenfuss, an elementary school teacher, gathered more information on green weddings they set about on a strategy to reduce consumption and energy.

They selected rings made out of recycled gold. They sent modest postcard invitations without the extra envelopes for RSVPs.

They chose locally grown, organic food and beverages for the reception. They made sure the plates and flatware would be reused, rather than plastic throwaways.

• They hired a band which uses equipment powered by solar energy.
  

The entire wedding will be zero waste, meaning the materials used can either be reused, recycled or composted, says Houdek. He first became aware of the potential for zero waste events when a local recycling organization helped him plan a zero waste Tour de Sprawl in 2006.

The popular one-day biking event which the North Star chapter holds annually offers riders a chance to learn more about urban sprawl, traditional neighborhood design and smart growth. More than 250 riders participated, ate lunch, and produced no waste that could not be recycled.

 Were trying in every way to make people more aware of their environment and how they can contribute to making the world a better place, says Papenfuss.  Rather than a wedding registry or gifts, the couple asks attendees to sign up for reforestation or recycling projects or donate to favorite environmental causes, including the Sierra Club.

Having a green wedding is not as challenging as it may seem. In a perfect world, Papenfuss concedes, her wedding would take place in a park directly on a transit line. But she and Houdek have made it much greener than the average wedding without that much more effort.

Its pretty easy and you can do it on almost any budget, so why not do it? she says. If you can do just bits and pieces, like using recycled plates, having the reception close to home, or using a vintage wedding dress, and going to an eco-resort, or camping.  Its not an all-or-nothing proposition, and every little bit helps.

And instead of throwing rice, fellow eco-daters attending the event might consider scattering a little organic birdseed as the happy couple departs for their honeymoon maybe some eco-tourism, with accommodations in a solar-heated and wind-electrified inn.